The Wonderful World of Revision

I have said goodbye to my cameras and life in general as I prepare for my last month at university, the dreaded exams. Luck would have it that I just love exams, so naturally I'm going to submerse myself in the wonderful world of revision. Of course I'm kidding, but it's the last push, as they say, and I will be damned if I don't give it 100%.

Unfortunately, 100% means I can't dedicate any time to anything else other than possibly sleeping, definitely eating (a bit) and maybe a 5 minute break every week or so to breathe fresh air. So you won't be seeing a lot of me until my last exam on May 20.

After that life will be blissful as I reunite with my beloved cameras and the online world.

I leave you with images from my last walk in the countryside before the madness began....

Philosophy Friday: There's no bad luck, only bad choices.

So Svenja from Happy Bluebird  had the great idea of starting a Philosophy Friday, which was perfect timing for me, as I've started writing a (hopefully) inspirational series on being happy. If you missed the first two posts, you should check them out. The first one is about things you can do everyday to become a happier person. The second one is about finding what will make you happy.

...Are you just with him for his money?

Today I'm inspired by dear friends who keep complaining that they have bad luck. In love, in life... in everything. And it got me thinking...

Sometimes we go through life accompanied by a little voice in our head that we confer with when making decisions. This little voice is called conscience.

Unfortunately, some of us outgrew our conscience, which is still very much... pre-pubescent, so we can't truly trust its judgement. When that happens, we tend to make bad choices in life that lead to outcomes we simply do not take into account way back when first confronted with the options. In other words - just like a child - we can't clearly anticipate:

"To every action, there's a consequence"

Even if it is unintended.

You may not know that you are one of these people. How can you tell? If you have a bunch of friends telling you that something you're doing is probably not the right thing to do but you still convince yourself that you're doing nothing wrong... then you probably are.

It may not be wrong per se... it may not be illegal (or it well could be!) but it simply means that on a deep level you want to ignore some warning signs and you're just not listening to yourself. The wrongdoing will affect your own happiness in the end. If you're not even trying to convince yourself and you have truly no clue of what you're doing wrong, you would probably benefit from counselling, as you may be subconsciously self-sabotaging. (No joke. They're truly awesome at helping you find.... well, yourself.)

What to do

Try listening to that little voice. And by listening, I mean doing what it says. Sometimes you don't know why, you can't rationalise it, but it's instinct. Don't ignore it!

If you have a feeling that you may be self-sabotaging (it's a way of ruining something for yourself when you're about to be happy), you should definitely seek counselling. There's an interesting blog post explaining this concept in detail in the Psychology Today website here.

Some examples

- at work: You've found out that there are irregular activities taking place and you plan to ignore it. Deep down you know you should whistle-blow, it's the right thing to do.
- relationships: You've started a friendship with someone who is not available and you've no plans to stop it even though there are some (dim) alarm bells ringing in your head that you might develop feelings for this person. Why even go further? Stop it before it's too late.
- money: You keep shopping like you earn millions and keep ignoring the credit card bill. Well, it can get better if you do something about it today.

 going by his expression, even this dog has a conscience!

 There is no bad luck. Only bad choices. You are the maker of your opportunities and your decisions affect what happens in your life. Every day, every single little decision.

Super foods: Pan-fried salmon with vegetables

We were hungry and we needed food straight away. Never mind the broccolis that look mutant-green, this recipe is quick, easy and full of vitamin everything. And it's ready in under 10 mins.

What you need

- broccoli

- salmon

- butter

- veggies (mushrooms and courgettes here)

- lemon

- salt & peps

What you do

1) Whack up a hob to max and put the kettle on.

2) Melt a knob of butter on another hob, medium-high heat, season your salmon and fry one side for about 4 mins.

3) Chop your veggies and add them to the frying pan.

4) Pour your water in a saucepan and place it on the super hot hob, add salt to the water and then add your broccoli.

5) After 3 minutes drain your broccoli and pour icy water over them (to stop overcooking, they should look bright green and have a bite to them) set aside, turn your salmon and season this side.

6) After a further 4 minutes turn all hobss off. Add the juice of 1 lemon to your salmon and plate up.

Ta da!

How to be happy: find out what you want.

"Funny that everyone is too busy living their lives to care about being happy."

Some people live their daily lives waiting for something to magically occur to bring them happiness. A key element of happiness is that it can't be brought upon you. You need to bring it upon yourself. And it starts right now.

Stop for a minute and look around you. What do you have that makes you happy? A new phone? A dog? The latest pair of Nike Air sneakers? A first class air ticket somewhere perhaps? A general rule to go by is that if you can take a picture of it and gloat Instagram it, then it won't bring you happiness.

That's because happiness is not a feeling. It's a way of living. When people ask me if I'm happy, I don't ask myself whether I'm happy right now. I feel happy inside. I am happy. Forever. I get depressed, I get grumpy, I get defeatist. I worry, I doubt myself, I lack self-confidence. But I am happy. And that's because I care about being happy.

What you can do:

Forget about what you are doing right now. Your job, your life. Grab a piece of paper and let your imagination run wild. Answer this:

>>> If you could be doing anything in the world, what would it be?
>>> What is your favourite thing to do?
>>> If you could choose how to live, how would you live?

I have a feeling Charlie is doing exactly what he wants. 

The crazy thing about these questions is that almost no one answers: "What I'm doing right now" or "The way I'm living it now". Why?

You are focusing on living your life without stopping to thing and act on the things that will actually make you happy.

I asked my dad these questions a long time ago. He loves what he does so much, but if money weren’t an issue, he answered, “I’d open a B&B by the sea somewhere”. My dream for him is that one day he does that.

Think long and hard about what you really want. Don’t fret – no one knows what they want, many people merely stumble upon something that they end up loving. And you can do it both ways. You may learn to love what you do… or you may want to find what you love.

Find smaller things too. Little goals. For me, in January, it was fitness. It wasn’t even, “I want to be fit”. It was, “I don’t want to be unfit”. And that was the day a friend came to me with the best advice I’ve ever received:

“Do one little thing today to achieve that goal. It may seem pointless; it may seem too small a step to make a difference. But a 1% improvement every day, and imagine where you’ll be in 100 days.”

That day I got off my arse and joined the gym. I haven’t stopped going since.

So, find out what makes you happy and take a small step every day towards making that happen. Don’t leave it till tomorrow. Start now.

Introducing Inspirational Lessons: How to be happy

There is a recurring theme in my head. Happiness. This intangible thing that everyone wants to have but no one knows quite how. I didn't think a lot about happiness before, I just was. But when your life enters periods of great change, uncertainty or stress, you lose your way and forget what's important.

My friends and I deeply discuss this every day. We meditate, philosophise... call it what you want. We talk about practical ways to be happy. No meta-nonsense. Things you can do. Things we do. Every day.

"You will never be happy. You will always want more."

It relates to treating the achievement of life milestones as a basis for happiness. Guess what? Sometimes life doesn't go as you plan. The more you worry, the least happy you are. Simple fact. In life, we go through stages, and we tend to see the accomplishment of a stage as a reason to be happy. And that's OK. The problem is we postpone happiness until that goal is achieved. We think, "when I get into uni, I'll be happy. Then it's, "when I graduate with a first class degree, I'll be happy". Then it's, "when I get a job, I'll be happy." Which quickly turns into, "when I get a highly paid job, I'll be happy".

This is all well and good. Having something to look forward to should be a motivation. But...

>>>What happens when you don't accomplish the goals you set?; and
>>>Are you sure you are setting yourself the right goals?

What you can do:

Be flexible. When there are big life decisions and it doesn't go the way we want it, we tend to be disappointed and some people can become unhappy for a long time. Visualise the life you want, but be flexible to unexpected outcomes - they could be a blessing in disguise!

For example, my third year of uni is a mandatory placement abroad. I desperately wanted a career in the supply chain, in continuous improvement or process improvement. I was in talks with BMW in the US and had submitted applications for tons of jobs elsewhere but couldn't get anything I wanted. Just before the deadline to accept a placement, a friend suggested I did a study placement abroad instead. And I went for it.

My ideal outcome was to get a job in the supply chain. My not so ideal outcome was to go on a study placement. What did I do? I turned my not so ideal into my ideal. I conditioned my brain to visualise the following:

A study placement will leave loads of free time for meeting new people, getting to know a new country and exploring it, travel, try something new. It will be relaxed, I can pick a hot country, it can be like a "year out".

And guess what? That year in Australia was the best thing to happen in my life (second best after meeting my husband). 

In the next "How to be happy" I'll talk about setting the right goals and finding what makes you happy. And just because, here's some more pics of my mate C talking about the subject.

Crazy Surfing Weekend in Newquay

When a couple of friends and I first founded the Aston Waves Surf Club (in the middle of Birmingham) I looked around and thought, "Where on earth are we going to surf here?"

One month later and we've had successful marketing campaigns, an amazing launch at Exhale Sheeshateria in Digbeth, Pancake Day for 50 people, a Mexican fiesta dinner and last weekend, we finally took the first bunch of members to a weekend trip of surf, games, laughter and partying! (YES! we are crazy. We went surfing on 1 degree celsius)

We started with an early departure and a break in Exeter for lunch. The weather was ominous to say the least, with dark dirty cotton-like clouds hanging just above our heads, threatening to dampen ourselves and our spirits. To top it all, my camera has been sent to have a check-up and cleaning, so I only had my iPhone for pictures. The rest were taken by my mate and a professional photographer on-site at the Guesthouse.

Would you believe it, as soon as we arrived in Exeter, the skies cleared and the sun came out, making it a lovely 10 - 13 degree day.

We decided on an old favourite of mine, La Tasca (because it's cheap and cheerful) and we kindly got 20% off the bill by joining the loyalty scheme. If you live in England and want a bite with friends, you should go there. They always have excellent deals on and you can just relax and have a long leisurely lunch.

  

The day was too beautiful to leave there and then so we headed to the Boston Tea Party rooms for some good quality coffee.



Exeter cathedral.

  

We arrived in Newquay, Cornwall in the evening and spent it walking about the beach, grabbing a few beers and having general banter in the dorm rooms. The following day was to be our first surfing lesson so we didn't want to use up all our energy.

By some miracle from God the sun came out. It became a mild day of about 13 - 15 degrees and after a simple breakfast we went next door to the Escape Surf School, working in conjunction with our B&B Belushi's (St Christopher's Inn).

Escape Surf School are brilliant. Our trainers Will and Caroline were patient, smiley, knowledgeable and professional. We were split into two groups based on whether we'd surfed before or not, and after a ground lesson on safety, balancing on the board, paddling, standing up, etc, we headed to the water. We were well wrapped-up in our wetsuits and booties, and incredibly, I didn't feel the cold!!! The only time when I felt like dying was when I jumped off my board into the water and my head (which wasn't protected with a hat) felt as if I had slowly eaten an iceberg. Brain frozen. I made a mental note to wear the... head suit? next time.

That's me up there and my mates are below here:

 
Me again:



Unfortunately silly me twisted her ankle as I balanced off the board. It was only slightly twisted but it was painful enough the following 3 days to prevent me from walking, standing on that foot and of course, surfing again. So the following day I was forced to watch as everyone else surfed away.

I started pondering what an amazing weekend I'd already had and it was only Sunday morning. Really, most people on the trip had never been surfing before or had only had one lesson. When we entered the water, most of them were catching waves and standing up.

There were people there for whom surfing had never crossed their mind. If you're reading this and have never given it a go (perhaps for a hen or stag do, party, just for the weekend, etc), to quote Nike, just do it. The weather doesn't matter. That you've never done it before doesn't matter. You will enjoy yourself like you're 8 years old again. Give Will a call (or check their website here), it's cheaper than you think.

Fun times were had. The ankle didn't ruin my weekend as we gathered round a beautiful park in Newquay to play frisbee. I mean, imagine stopping to play with this view!

On the way back we had a lovely stop in Bristol for dinner and then we fell asleep till we reached Birmingham again. By that time, it was snowing. I couldn't believe how lucky we'd been with the weather, and everything else. The group had a blast, I had a blast and a blasted ankle and we're already planning the next trip.